Bitches Be Doing Shit Club crest
BITCHES BE DOING SHIT
EST. WHENEVER WE FELT LIKE IT · NORTH SHORE, MA, MAINE, VERMONT, THE ATLANTIC OCEAN, SCOTLAND, WHATEVS
A social society for women who already have plans, thank you.

We ski. We sail.
We do not take applications.

B.B.D.S. is the North Shore's most exclusive, most invitation-only, most "how do I even get in" answer to the question "what are you doing this weekend." Tennis, mahjong, hunting, boats, and a lecture series nobody actually attends but everyone RSVPs to.

Membership is by invitation only. We will know if you screenshot this page.
Bitches Be Doing Shit Club crest

“Sometimes we do good. Sometimes we do bad.”

The Society

Exactly as exclusive as it sounds.

B.B.D.S. began the way most great institutions do: several women, several bottles of Sancerre, and a shared realization that the North Shore had plenty of book clubs but not nearly enough places to talk about tennis, mahjong, and Clem's Clam boat naming drama in the same sentence.

We are not a philanthropy, though we do occasionally write a check. We are not a wellness collective, though someone is always doing a cleanse. We are a members-only social society for women who ski hard, sail harder, and have never once been wrong in a board meeting — or at all actually.

Membership is capped, curated, and entirely by invitation. If you're reading this and wondering how to join, that in itself tells us something.

She said "I don't have time for a club" and then joined three group chats about it. That's how we found her. — FOUNDING MEMBER, ON RECRUITMENT PHILOSOPHY
What We Do

A very full calendar, run with military discipline and zero regrets.

Our activities calendar covers land, water, and whatever mahjong table we've commandeered this month. A sampling, for the curious and the uninvited alike.

On the Water

  • Rides on the Lady Boat (officially, "Nautical Independence" — say it right)
  • Wife yachting, a sport we invented and refuse to explain
  • Fishing trips that are 0% fish, 100% rosé
  • Paddleboard yoga followed by a scavenger hunt for the best lobster roll
  • The Yacht Derby, our nautical answer to Kentucky, hats required, heels banned
  • Lady Boat, Gentleman's Hour — sunset cruise, no husbands allowed to speak

On the Court & Slope

  • Lots of. Fucking. Tennis.
  • Skiing and more skiing, North Shore women do not stay in the lodge
  • Pickleball tournaments (just kidding!) immediately followed by martinis (not kidding!!) ("No Dink, All the Drink")
  • Sunrise spin, sunset champagne tower, same day, no in-between
  • Falconry lessons, because someone's cousin knows a guy

Very Cultural

  • Book club with an actual lecture series, attendance optional, opinions mandatory
  • Concerts, box seats, minimal singing along
  • Mahjong road trips to wherever there's a tournament and a decent hotel bar
  • Competitive flower arranging, $500 budget, a real sommelier judging
  • Truffle hunting with an actual truffle dog, obviously

Deeply Unserious

  • Hunting trips, sometimes for game, always for gossip
  • Iceland or Scotland hunting trips, Holland & Holland 20-gauges in hand, jewelry matched to the shotgun case
  • Buying necklaces with Roman coins in them, a hobby that is also a personality
  • Estate sale safaris, carpool required, trophies awarded
  • Casino night with poker chips shaped like lobsters, ask us how
  • "Guess the Renovation Budget," a walking tour of each other's kitchens (don't even ask about the fucking roof budget!)
The Parties

Legendary nights. Ask a member, if you know one.

Certain events on our calendar have achieved local myth status. We won't confirm or deny anything you may have heard.

Members Only · Annual

The Exclusive Wenham Firefighters Beaver Party

Exactly what it sounds like, and also not at all what you're thinking, and also, yes, a little bit what you're thinking. Held annually with the good people of the Wenham Fire Department, whose only job that night is to look extremely handsome near a truck. Attendance is capped. Photography is discouraged. Legends are made.

Members Only · Full Moon

Midnight Buoy Tipping Party

A time-honored North Shore tradition, loosely based on cow tipping, entirely based on how many buoys we can reach from the Lady Boat before someone falls in. No buoys were harmed. Several members were. Worth it.

Members Only · Design Required

The Sunglass Atelier

Every member arrives with a pair of sunglasses of her own design — leather detailing mandatory, whether it's worked into the temples or set into the bridge. Off-the-rack does not clear the door. Neither, for the record, do clip-ons.

Derby Day

Mint juleps, fascinator contest, a betting pool drawn from a hat. Loser does a shot of bourbon and owns it.

The Yacht Derby

Derby Day, but on a boat. The race is on the big screen, the dinghy race is the undercard, heels are again banned, and — every single year, without fail — a bald eagle soars over the harbor at some point mid-event. We don't question it. We just toast to it.

Field Day, But Make It Lilly

Sack races and egg tosses in full Lilly Pulitzer. Black tie is optional. Competitive spirit is not.

Paint Sample Night

Bring an actual paint-to-sample swatch matched to your Porsche — air-cooled or current generation, your call, but it cannot be a base model, and yes, we will ask which trim. Then you paint your nails to match. Swatches get pinned to the board, nails get inspected. Best match wins the center table.

Boat Naming Night

Every new member gets christened into the fleet: the existing members name her Lady Boat for her, no vetoes, no appeals. Past results have included several puns nobody's proud of and at least one name that got a boat banned from a marina.

The Lexicon

You'll need this glossary. You're welcome.

Every institution has its own language. Ours has been refined over many, many boat rides.

Lady Boat
Officially "Nautical Independence." Do not call it the Lady Boat in front of the harbor master. Do call it that every other time.
Wife Yachting
A sport of our own invention. Rules are unclear. Scoring is vibes-based. Undefeated so far.
Dink & Drink
Pickleball, immediately followed by martinis. No cooldown period.
Coin Necklace Era
The Roman coin phase every member enters roughly six months after joining. There is no known cure. We don't want one.
Buoy Tipping
See: Midnight Buoy Tipping Party. Not to be attempted sober.
The Beaver Party
We're not defining this one. If you know, you know. If you don't, that's sort of the point.
Bitches Be Doing Shit Club crest
Membership

Here's the thing about "how do I join."

Membership in B.B.D.S. is by invitation only, extended by existing members, reviewed by a committee that meets on the Lady Boat and nowhere else. There is no application. There is no waitlist. There is only a very good group chat, and you're either already in it or you're not.

Ask us about it anyway
Reach Out

Get in touch.

Have a question about an event, a press inquiry, or something else entirely? Fill out the form. We read everything.

We just want to be very upfront about one particular checkbox.

Choose carefully. One of these options ends differently than the others.